Depending on the gender, there will be clothes to be purchased due to the varying seasons of birth. And well because I like to buy new clothes for each baby. A new car seat will follow not long after he/she arrives. Possibly a new, different double stroller to fit in the trunk after we must use the 3rd row in the Explorer.
Traveling home solo will now require buying a ticket for Adelaide and Aspen because you can only have one lap child.
Then of course there is all of the little trinkets and such that the other two have had which must be bought for the third. Because I believe in quality and fairness for my children.
But in the end it is all worth it to see that sweet baby face. My third child. It sounds so funny to say. In a few short months, I will be saying either the girls or the boys. Plurals. I will have 2 of some gender. Ahhhhhh!
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| 18 weeks |
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To my sweet baby,
It has been an unusual start for the two of us. When I found out that I was pregnant, I was shocked & excited & overwhelmed. Then a few days later I thought I was losing you. I loved you and I didn't even know you. I spent 2 1/2 weeks agonizing over whether you were still growing in my belly. Analyzing every last thing in my body. It was the longest 2 weeks of my life. At 7 1/2 weeks I saw your heartbeat. What an amazing relief and incredible feeling! One I was incredibly thankful to God for.
But at 11 1/2 weeks, while daddy & I were out on a date night, I began bleeding. We immediately drove to the ER where I sat silent the entire car ride. I held my stomach tight holding onto you for dear life as if that was going to make a difference. In my mind I spoke to you, please baby hold on; I promise we can make it through this together. After a few hours of testing and the longest sonogram of my life, I saw your sweet heartbeat again and was assured that you were doing fine.
Our 12 week sonogram appointment a few days later gave us great hope and reassurance as you bounced around the whole time. Hearing your heartbeat at 16 weeks was a blessing as well as a few days ago during our anatomy scan. I even got to hear you on Mother's Day thanks to my friend Marissa and her hand held fetal doppler that she let me borrow ;)
But at 11 1/2 weeks, while daddy & I were out on a date night, I began bleeding. We immediately drove to the ER where I sat silent the entire car ride. I held my stomach tight holding onto you for dear life as if that was going to make a difference. In my mind I spoke to you, please baby hold on; I promise we can make it through this together. After a few hours of testing and the longest sonogram of my life, I saw your sweet heartbeat again and was assured that you were doing fine.
Our 12 week sonogram appointment a few days later gave us great hope and reassurance as you bounced around the whole time. Hearing your heartbeat at 16 weeks was a blessing as well as a few days ago during our anatomy scan. I even got to hear you on Mother's Day thanks to my friend Marissa and her hand held fetal doppler that she let me borrow ;)
The picture above is you, my dear, at 19 weeks. Our anatomy scan showed you flourishing and measuring 2 days ahead of your due date. I am not surprised ;) My placenta is a little low so hopefully it will rise and grow with you accordingly. As everything so far, we will weather this new bump in the road together.
Each of my children have a special meaning/place in my heart & soul. Your big sister Adelaide is our "honeymoon/house hunting" baby who was conceived with ease, grown with love, and birthed with a bit of fear. I always feel as if the oldest is at a disadvantage as the baby and the mom navigate this journey together but as first timers. Her & I have fumbled often but we are definitely in this together and learning every step of the way. Your big brother Aspen is our "miracle" baby, the one we tried tirelessly for 9 months going through test after test fearing the worst. He was anticipated with much excitement and born with a calmness. He & I have a give and take relationship and he flat out adores Adelaide (as she does him). And you, my dear, are our "saving grace" baby for so many reasons. Conceived as a surprise, fiercely fought for, and a ride every step of the way so far. Plus one day when you are older I will tell you the story of how I believe that you saved me. It is a personal story that only a few select know, but I cannot thank you enough for being you and being here at this exact time.
I love you my sweet baby and cannot wait to meet you in October!
Love,
Mommy
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