In light of the recent tragedy in Newtown, I have been reflecting a lot this weekend. Despite being a new parent I do not view the shootings differently. Perhaps because I have always been deeply touched and moved by such situations. While I cuddled a little closer and hugged Adelaide a little tighter, the horror ran just as deep as 9/11 and Columbine for me.
Which only strengthened my attitude of this: do not let the evil of the world inhibit you or make you fearful. I have flown more since 9/11. Our child(ren) will go to school. My faith will be more powerful. I will not be broken.
"So do not fear for I am with you; do not be dismayed for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous hand."
Isiah 41:10
Today I went to church with my mom. She attends the Christian church in our neighborhood and I always love going there when I am home. *Even though I'm Catholic, I firmly believe that God is happy with whatever church I attend so long as I am praising Him.* One of my favorite parts of the service is when the pastor calls up the children to the alter. He spends about 10 minutes explaining the message to them in a kid-friendly way. This Sunday it was extra special to be witnessing the testimony of love, hope, and joy on this 3rd week of Advent.
For the *adult* portion of worhip, Reverend Mike began discussing joy. How we were made for joy. How scripture (Philippians 4:4-7) tells us to rejoice! again I say rejoice! How the first angel told us about the greatest joy. We have inner & outer joy. Within it is the light of the Lord. Outside it is external circumstances. So often we are stripped of our joy due to hurry, slurry, and worry. Hurry is our need to always be rushing. We zip in and zip out. We get aggrevated if we have to wait for anything. Slurry is the nature to compare ourselves/our lives to others. Who has more financially; who is smarter; who's child is developing faster. Worry is the fear of the future. The unknown. When all the while the future is already out of our control. It always has been.
The Lord made each and every one of us to be filled with joy. We, as humans, can allow the external factors of our life to take that away. We can let our hurry, slurry, and worry crowd our minds and hearts with fear. We can allow what happened on Friday to strip the joy that we have especially during this special time.
Or...
We can choose to surrender the power and the control. Surrender the fear and anxiety. To return to the Light. To put God back in all aspects of our lives. Not just the parts that we find convenient. We can choose not to point fingers. Not to place blame. Not to debate the how and the why because let's face it, we will never really know or understand.
So I have decided to choose the latter. To the best of my ability. I am human. And I will make mistakes. There will be times when I falter or fail. There will be times when I lose my way or lose sight of life's joy.
But I know the light of the Lord will remain inside my heart.
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